


forever if you ask

by Authumnder



Category: Men's Hockey RPF
Genre: Alternate Universe, M/M, Not Hockey Players (Hockey RPF)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-05
Updated: 2019-10-05
Packaged: 2020-11-24 02:08:26
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,224
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20899898
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Authumnder/pseuds/Authumnder
Summary: “His name is Tyler Seguin,” his mom explains, a smitten look gracing her face. Apparently she and Mrs. Seguin, whose family rented the next-door cottage, already know each other via Facebook or something. Their bags are still laying around their feet, temporarily abandoned. “What a nice boy! Isn’t he, Jamie?”Jamie gives a nonchalant look at the boy next door, and.No.No, Jamie definitely does not think he is a nice boy.





	forever if you ask

**Author's Note:**

> this is very... fast-paced and shitty (though i still hope it's not completely unreadable hdfjkhf). just wanted to get in some practice i guess. ALSO my first hockey rpf so characterization might be... super duper off? hope you enjoy! kudos & comments would be super appreciated (though i'm already glad you took the time click on this story lmao). ♡♥

(i)

Jamie’s first day of summer goes like this:

He didn’t succeed in convincing his parents to let him stay home, for _reasons_, and so he had to agree to their initial plan, which is renting a cottage in some remote beach and staying there like a bunch of provincial people (which is simply not true, because his mother has said about a million times that _yes, Jamie, there _is _internet over there _and _no, Jamie, you don’t have to turn your phone off the whole time because there _is _electricity_, which, yeah, those two might be the only reasonable arguments Jamie could come up with. He’s not ashamed _at all_ about his miserable confrontational skill).

So he’d come with them, and he still thinks it’s unfair because his brother Jordie managed to avoid the whole thing altogether because he was working his summer job at a sports store in the mall, and so he’s totally unprepared to face what’s about to come.

“His name is Tyler Seguin,” his mom explains, a smitten look gracing her face. Apparently she and Mrs. Seguin, whose family rented the next-door cottage, already know each other via Facebook or something. Their bags are still laying around their feet, temporarily abandoned. “What a nice boy! Isn’t he, Jamie?”

Jamie gives a nonchalant look at the boy next door, and. _No. _

No, Jamie definitely does not think he is a nice boy.

(ii)

Jamie isn’t judgmental, okay.

Fine. Maybe a little bit. But. He is also pretty sure that Tyler is younger than him, a year or two tops, and yet there is something unsettling about him—a spark, if you will, the kind that screams bad upon the first encounter and no, no, Jamie isn’t about to socialise with that kind of person.

Even though that kind of person is so fucking good looking Jamie’s _fingers _tremble when he first saw him.

Also, Tyler’s got _tattoos_. They aren’t that visible, probably because Tyler is still in school like him, which doesn’t allow much freedom, but they are still there and they _intimidate _Jamie in a way that he himself can’t explain.

“You’re just jealous you don’t have the balls to do that first.” Jordie counters easily. “You’ve been wanting some, Jamie, don’t even try to lie.” Which is true enough that Jamie finds himself hanging up on his brother without even bothering to think of a reply.

“Do you have a _crush, _Jamie? You’ve, what, just known him for two days?” is what Jenny says, and is reason enough for Jamie to reply _shut up_ before hanging up again.

Yeah, his siblings aren’t the nicest people.

(iii)

A week in and two more encounters with Tyler (both indeliberate because fine, fine, Jenny, Jamie _is _chicken), Jamie is not proud to announce that yeah, he’s totally got a crush on the guy.

(iv)

“What’d you do over there all day?” Tyler asks one morning, perched on the low wall dividing the cottage Jamie’s family is in and the Seguins’. “You never came out, dude.”

“I do come out,” Jamie hastily replies.

Tyler quirks an eyebrow. He looks as though he is amused with Jamie’s quick denial, which annoys the hell out of Jamie. “Yeah?”

“Totally!”

He is getting worked up, he knows it, and he absolutely knows that worked-up Jamie is never good. He is reckless and quick to make a bad decision. Jamie knows all this and still look up to meet Tyler’s glinting eyes with fake bravado, hoping for Tyler to realise that Jamie is saying the truth (Jamie totally isn’t) and back off, or honestly, just hoping for the best.

“Yeah? So you will come out tonight and go to a party at the house in the corner? Some college guys live there for the summer and they said it’s an open one, so we’re okay to crash. You will, yeah?” Tyler says, both eyebrows now risen, and it’s fucking annoying because for some reason the sun is shining just right and there is a fucking _ray_ in the back of Tyler’s head and he is glowing.

Jamie can feel his fingers start to tremble again.

Fuck no, Jamie wants to reply, there’s no way he is crashing a _college guys_’ party where drinks are most probably available. Jamie does not trust himself not to be peer-pressured into taking them. And he fucking _hates _the drunk version of himself.

Instead, what comes out of his mouth is:

“Fine.”

(Tyler’s answering grin is so blinding that Jamie is forced to close his eyes to protect them.)

(v)

In theory, Jamie should’ve seen this coming and like, prepares for it, since it’s practically _inevitable, _and he knows himself, alright, knows so fucking well that he is barely _surprised _when he realises he is drunk (not the blackout kind, not yet, at least, but it’s. Um. A close thing. Most probably one more gulp of another can of shitty beer _close_).

Still, even amidst his daze, he can’t help thinking how irresponsible he is, letting himself get this drunk in a sea (more like a _pond_) of other drunk college students, when he has nowhere to crash in aside from his rented cottage where his fucking family resides. No way in hell he is getting back there. His mom would probably yell at him for ten minutes straight and then ignores him for the rest of the summer—which is totally unnecessary and unneeded, considering how bad Jamie already felt right now. Worst comes to worst, he’d wake up on the beach alone. He has to admit sand doesn’t sound that bad as a substitute for his warm, warm bed. He can deal.

“Dude, are you having a bad trip? Your face’s like, all scrunched up right now.”

Oh. And Tyler’s here, too. Jamie can deal with this.

“Jamie. Dude.” Tyler squints his eyes, and subsequently Jamie does, too. “Are you—are you drunk already?”

_Already?_ How early is it that Jamie is considered drunk _already_? He looks around the room to see if there are any clocks around, which turns out to be a rookie mistake because now his whole world spins uncontrollably. Fucking fuck.

“All right, I think that’s enough alcohol for you,” Tyler says, his voice a faint back sound in the crowd. Jamie can’t believe Tyler’s being the responsible one between the two of them—what with his, um, outer appearance and, uh, whatever the fuck. Apparently Jamie says this out loud because Tyler’s laughing and saying, “I know, dude, can’t believe that, too. Let’s go.”

(vi)

_Go _turns out to have the beach as the destination. Not that Jamie’s protesting, since it’s his bed for the night. His loose lips spewed this out too and Tyler squints his eyes at him some more, tells him he is being stupid and that there’s no way Tyler’s letting him sleep out in the nature like this, not when the temperature could drop any fucking time and Jamie has no blankets or coats.

“But it’s summer, Tyler,”

Tyler only rolls his eyes at that.

The Seguins’ residence for the summer turns out to have a very functional backdoor, which of course Tyler exploits.

Tyler’s room is clean and tidy, clear from any dirty clothes or shoes strewn around, unlike Jamie’s, and his double bed is made, which. Okay. Maybe Jamie is a judgemental bastard—at least when it comes to Tyler.

They got to talking like that, pushed up against each other in the darkened room, Tyler an almost invisible but solid presence. Jamie finds himself spilling things, intimate things he totally wouldn’t in any other situation with a stranger, or whatever it is Tyler is to him. And strangely? Jamie feels comfortable there. He doesn’t want to look too much into things, except that it’s nice, really nice, and decides to stop thinking anything there.

(ix)

The morning after (not _that kind _of morning after, obviously) is a bit of an awkward mess. Jamie didn’t set alarm on his phone—not that that’d be functional or useful considering his phone died a peaceful death last night—but he rouses awake with the sun, Tyler forgetting to shut his blinds, and feels so groggy he kind of wants to close his eyes and never open them again.

God this is why Jamie hates drinking.

He tries to make as little movement as possible, tries not to shake the bed too much, which turns out to be a failure because Tyler’s eyes blink open as Jamie attempts to climb over him.

Their gazes lock awkwardly.

Jamie clears his throat. He is still practically on top of Tyler, right leg already touching the floor and the other still folded uncomfortably beside Tyler’s. He clears his throat some more because Tyler’s unfazed glare starts to get unnerving.

“Not even a goodbye?” Tyler says. “Not nice, Jamie.” Then he promptly goes back to sleep and Jamie. Jamie does what he always does.

He runs.

(x)

Jenny calls him a rude ass bastard, in that exact word, which Jamie sputters at but doesn’t rebuke because it’s the truth. Or close to it, at the very least.

“He helped you out, Jamie,” Jenny says.

“I know, Jenny.” Jamie says.

“And you repaid him by running away like a coward.”

“I know, Jenny.”

“I don’t know what goes on in that head of yours,” she says, long suffering, and Jamie begins to regret the apparent mistake in calling her to rant about last night. “Don’t you have a crush on him, bud?”

Jamie sputters some more.

“Yeah, I know. Crushes are hard, Jamie.”

“I don’t see any point in this conversation,”

“Me neither.” Jenny says, then, “Maybe you should ask him out. Get lunch together, that seems friendly enough. I mean, the guy _did _save your ass from dying frozen.”

“Jenny—” Jamie starts to whine but of course she cuts him off.

“Of course you don’t have to do any of this and spend the rest of the summer moping over him instead.”

“Jen.”

She cackles. “Yeah, I didn’t think so.”

(xi)

So, lunch. Jamie could do lunch. Tyler is a teenage boy and teenage boy doesn’t decline free lunch. And Jenny is right, lunch is friendly enough, but not too much in the way dinner is. Lunch he can do. Yes.

Jamie can see Tyler from where he’s sitting on the porch of his cottage, doing his daily run with the dogs at the beach, throwing them sticks and then laughing when the dogs bring them back. He seems sweet, carefree and wild but also really kind, a lot different than what Jamie thought of him that first day he arrived here.

Okay. Lunch. Here we go.

Jamie makes his way slowly over to where Tyler and the dogs are, building up sentences to speak, throwing in some apology—Jamie’s good at apology, apparently he has these kicked puppy eyes, as Jenny likes to call. Hopes for Tyler to not be immune to them.

“Tyler. Um. Hey.” Jamie calls, when he’s a lot closer.

Tyler turns, squints his eyes at Jamie before flatly says hi back. Jamie doesn’t know what to do about that.

“Um. I was wondering if you wanted to get lunch.” Jamie says. “Together. Uh, with me.” Of course with _you_, stupid, who else? Jamie scolds. Good god, he cannot stand himself.

One of the dogs arrives with a stick, and Tyler takes a moment to throw it at the general direction of the beach again before straightening up to face Jamie. “Took you long enough,” he says.

Jamie furrows his eyebrows.

“You know I can _see _your house clearly from here, right? Which means I can see you sitting since like an hour ago fidgeting like mad.”

Jamie… doesn’t know what to react to that. Except flush. Because _of course _Jamie is flushing. Anyway, that doesn’t sound like a yes to him, which is sort of surprising, considering Jamie’s earlier assessment about teenage boys and free lunches. But only sort of, because free lunches might not sound exciting when it includes the Jamie Package (that consists of Jamie and his awkwardness).

“I’m sorry?”

“Don’t apologise,” Tyler says, rolling his eyes, which. Rude. “Where are you taking me?”

Huh?

Tyler must’ve seen the stupid confused look on Jamie’s face because he adds right after: “Lunch, Jamie. Where are you taking me for lunch?”

Right. Lunch. Jamie didn’t actually think where he’s taking Tyler for lunch. “I didn’t actually think where I’m taking you for lunch.”

“Bad move, Jamie.” Tyler replies, although this time it doesn’t sound patronizing, just. Amused? “Made your attempt at reconciliation seem half-assed.”

Jamie shrugs. “A minute ago I thought you were gonna say no.”

Tyler rolls his eyes again at that. He seems to fancy doing that. “Dude,” he says. “No teenage boys will say no to free lunch.”

(xii)

“I’m glad that you’re getting along really well with Tyler, Jamie,” is what Jamie immediately hears after getting home, admittedly late for dinner with the family, again, like he had yesterday, and the day before, and the day before it as well. He senses a _but _following that, which makes him feel guilty.

“I know. I’m sorry, Mom.” He says. “I was just… unaware of the time, that’s all.”

It’s actually the truth—it’s hard to care about such trivial thing like time when he is with Tyler, whom Jamie might be harboring a really huge crush on. They have moved on from stilted conversations and mean eyes-rolling to actual, flowing conversations (and this time not just because Jamie is intoxicated) and amused, well-meaning eyes-rolling, which is an amazing step up Jamie’s proud of.

Now his days of summer are filled with having breakfast with his family, then a jog on the beach (with Tyler, if he’s actually awake), then hours of lazing around on the beach (with Tyler), then lunch (with Tyler, although now they’ve moved from getting takeouts to taking turns bringing homemade sandwiches), then playing video games in the Seguins’ when it gets too hot to spend the day outdoor (of course with Tyler), then it’s dinner time with the family again. It’s… a lot of Tyler.

He waits some more for the _but _to actually come, but when he looks up he finds his mom staring at him with this...tender...look that gets him super uncomfortable and awkward.

“Everything okay, Mom?” he asks when he can’t take the awkwardness any longer.

“Of course.” She says. But the look doesn’t quite leave her face.

(xiii)

It’s another swimming and then tanning session on the beach when Jamie finally acts out on impulse.

They both actually burn like lobsters under the summer sun, which obviously isn’t a flattering look, but Tyler likes to lay around doing nothing, and Jamie is helpless and hopeless when it comes to him, so of course he willingly agrees to the activity.

They’re in the middle of talking about nothing interesting in particular, those mindless things Tyler somehow always has opinions on, and everything is just hazy and slow and calm, the beach almost empty save for the two of them.

Jamie… Jamie _wants. _

It’s not that he doesn’t think about it before this, thinks about touching Tyler or holding his hand or kissing him, thinks of getting into intimate situations with him, he just doesn’t think he’s going to actually act on it. Or at least be the one to initiate it, because no way in hell Jamie’s not going to reciprocate if Tyler makes the first move.

But this wanting is—urgent. Either do, or die. Quick, you only have two seconds before getting wiped from the earth kind of thing. It’d be overwhelming if Jamie isn’t being flooded with adrenaline and getting high off it.

He takes a few seconds to wonder how he’s going to do it. He personally thinks doing it by surprise would be the best choice, but Jenny told him a while ago that’s actually not a good way to kiss someone for the first time, “consent is an important aspect you should take care of before doing the dirty, Jamie.” which… okay. Makes sense. Jamie absolutely doesn’t want to get slapped across the face if turns out he’s read the situation wrongly. (He hopes not. God, please no.)

“Tyler,” Jamie cuts in the middle of Tyler’s rant about… umbrellas? “Would you like it if I kiss you right now?” and then he bites his mouth, hard, because it’s finally out there. He almost cannot believe this.

It takes Jamie a moment to realise that a few seconds have passed and Tyler hasn’t said anything that indicates an answer for his question. When their gaze meet again, Jamie feels his body go frozen from the cold in Tyler’s eyes. That is obviously not a consenting expression—Jamie’s probably misread the situation terribly when in reality Tyler’s not even into guys, or most probably he just isn’t into Jamie and fuck. Fuck. fuckfuckfuckfuckfuck. What the fuck is he going to do now?

“Tyler I’m so sorry,” he sputters quickly. “I didn’t mean to assume, I was just—” he trails off, doesn’t know where to go from there. He was just, what? Thinking he had a chance to be something _more _in Tyler’s life? Thinking it wasn’t totally impossible for Tyler to have feelings for him, as Jamie have, foolishly, since the first week after they met each other?

He wasn’t thinking, is the truth. He was just losing his grip on real life. His talks with Jenny about taking a chance and doing what he wants to do for once have gotten into his mind and ruined his rationality so bad that he _really _thought Tyler would say yes to Jamie asking him to be his… his something. More than a friend.

Oh my god, could it be that all this time Tyler just thinks of him as that shy loser next door who desperately needs friend? “_Poor him, still managed to be a loser even when no one actually knows him, maybe I’ll do my summer charity by being his friend”_?

Fortunately before Jamie could spiral further, Tyler’s voice cuts in. “Dude, I’m not saying no, stop doing that face,” he says. “I just don’t want to be like, a summer fling that you’re going to leave and forget after summer ends. Been there done that and it wasn’t fun, so. If that’s what you’re aiming here…” Tyler shrugs, unapologetic. “..sorry dude.”

Just like that, Jamie can breathe again.

(xiv)

Kissing Tyler feels like getting hit in the chest again and again, but in a good way, not in a violent one, which Jamie can’t actually explain—he’s too busy getting hit at the moment.

The summer is ending quickly, Jamie knows, and liking a boy he’s going to say goodbye to in only a few weeks seems like a bad, bad idea, and Jamie knows this, knows that Tyler knows as well. But it feels too good, everything is, and. It goes without saying, at least for Jamie, though it’s at the tip of his tongue: _I can do forever if you ask, _held back only by Tyler’s soft mouth against his_. _It’s silly, but feeling often is.

Whatever, Jamie can deal.

He’ll cross the bridge when he gets to it.


End file.
